I've been asked by more than one person for an in depth review of this weekend, one of my favorites on record. Like a good performer, I intend to tease you with details you could care less about, stringing you along gingerly until you can't stand it any more and then and only then (insert almost ANY hand-gesture here) : GIVE IT 2 YOU.
I left PDX in the rain and I arrived into Oakland into the fucking POURING ASS RAIN. I take for granted that I can walk down the street in Portland while its raining and not really get 'wet'-- more like, damp... unlike this stunning downpour in Oakland, which --for anyone who was on the wildly successful Charm-Garcia 2008 Tour Stop in Nashville can attest--was the kind of precipitation that soaks right into your skeleton.
To back up for a moment (and delay the gratification just a tad bit more)-- allow me to inform you that my flight was on time, which is all I can really ask for these days. We DID encounter turbulence and I did get a little edgy about it-- the captain ordered everyone to sit down and shut down beverage service, which may have been a bit premature and/or dramatic, but all the same I was happy to not have to wrangle a cup of ice during turbulence. Note to my physician: I would be happy to accept any anti-anxiety meds via legal prescription, especially ones that will help relieve the pressure in my ears. I don't know what will keep me from flying first-- my growing irrational phobia, or my never-ending about-to-burst ear pressure problems.
For those of you not already in the know, I am staying with my friend RaLon, the oldest friend I gots! We've been friends for (taking moment of silence to do the math in my head) Twenty.Three.Years. She's got about 5 extra years of Madonna-obsession on me, though, cuz I was busy wallpapering my walls with posters of Jon Bon Jovi and Tommy Lee. So she has me beat on that one thing. :)
Also (God this is great, how I keep thinking of things to distract me from telling you what you want to know!) - I should mention that coming to the Bay Area really fucks me up emotionally. I've never lived here, but my parents did and my extended family is sprinkled all around here. I've spent many a vacation in and out of SF, Berkeley, Santa Clara, San Mateo, San Jose, Tiburon, Alameda, and yep-- Oakland. Keep in mind that being here puts me in a unique, familar, sentimental mood-- and get ready for me to extoll the virtues of one Madonna Ciccone. I'm not sure how to review this show without delving needlessly into my own psychotic feelings regarding the subject, but I'll do my damndest to keep it together. Stick with me...
Did you know that it is common knowledge in Madonna-land that Madonna does NOT start on time? I know that no one does, typically-- but in the trenches we all are aware of the fact that it is not unusual for our lady M to start around an hour late, so many of us were surprised when the show started somewhat on early at a whopping 840pm! Shocking to none would be the news that when the lights went down, the place went fucking NUTS! I had seen some footage of the tour and knew the basics of what I was about to experience, but had no idea how much fun it would be.
The show was essentially divided into four parts-- pimp, old school, gypsy, and rave. That sounds hella generic, but it helps me keep the sections straight in my mind. I won't go through the entire show song by song, I mean-- unless you really, REALLY want me to... (or you can just wait for the dvd).
Come to think of it, I can't really figure out how to review the show, except to tell you that the lady works her fucking ass off for two hours straight, she *seems* to be having fun doing the show, she *seems* to love the fact that we all had fun, her dancers are jaw-dropping, her band is toight like toiger! The theme of this show seems to be ... Be Present. Oh, and shake your fucking ass! The pimp section was all flashy, glam, upbeat-- and had the coolest version of "Vogue" I've ever heard. Get thee to ye olde youtube and check it out.
The old school section made me so happy, because it was essentially the Keith Haring section of the show (some of you dear readers know I am a huge fan of his)-- all the backdrops featured Haring-inspired animation, and seriously-- how can you not look at a Haring piece and feel more alive than you ever have before?!!! Not to mention--- JUMP ROPE! The H.B.I.C. did freaking double dutch! Highlights: Madonna strapping on a sparkly Gibson SG to rock out on "Borderline" AND... this (it gets going at the end!)...I mean, the lady can crawl on her hands and knees like NO OTHER.
GYPSY section was the "mellowest" section of the show, and all you need to really know is that she sang a song from "Evita" called "You Must Love Me" (semi-funny, huh, for a woman with a self-described huge ego!)-- and it may have been her best vocal performance ever. So simple, straighforward-- she's officially a singer now, not just an entertainer.
The RAVE section was chock full of highlights!
- the already-controversial political video interlude "Get Stupid"
- "Like a Prayer" as I've never heard it before - electrotrancetastic!
- Madonna playing "Hung Up" on guitar... IN DROP D TUNING (that tidbit is for the guitarists reading!)
- "Give It 2 Me" - the best track off the Hard Candy album to finish us all off...
The second night, I was about 6 people away from the catwalk. It... it, uh, changed me fundamentally.
What else am I supposed to write? Who knows! My mind is spinning after seeing the shows, SO MUCH FUN and good for you, too! All I know is my laptop battery is about to kick it, and you're bored as hell! Too bad you're not at a Madonna show...
